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I have been masturbating for more than 30 years

Matthew 11:28-29

28 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

For more than 30 years I was in active masturbation. Despite the fact that I grew up in a Christian home and was introduced to Christ at a young age, my desire to masturbate never stopped. In fact, the more I desired to learn more about Christ and longed to stay disciplined in my decision to stop masturbating, the more I find myself falling back into it. A time came in my life when I concluded I could never have victory over this sin. It was a great burden to me as I knew I was not living a faithful Christian life. In those dark days, after masturbating, I find myself wondering about what Jesus would say about me, and how disgusting I must be to Him. I felt dirty and would want to stay away from God’s word or anything reminding me of Christ and his sufferings for me. Indeed my sin has pulled me away from God.

But your iniquities have built barriers between you and your God, and your sins have hidden His face from you, so that He does not hear.(Isaiah 59:2).

As a Christian, separation from God meant a lot to me; not just spiritually but also physically as I struggled with staying focused at work or maintaining a peaceful atmosphere with my wife and children. Even though I knew I had Christian brothers/sisters struggling with the same problem it was impossible to share my struggles with anyone. The devil had successfully instilled fear in me. What would people say about me? What would my wife/children say if they find out? what would my pastor say? all these questions made me stay in my little dark corner.

One day, during one of my ceremonial prayer and bible reading sessions, I heard the verse “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” being repeated in my mind over and over again. I decided to purse and meditate on that verse.

  1. Come unto me all ye that labour: I realized I was laboring and I heard the spirit of God calling me to come unto Jesus. How then can I come?
  2. Prayer: Jesus says I will never leave you nor abandon you. Jesus understood the journey won’t be easy, He knew I would be this dirty, yet He died for me and still speaks to me through His word.
  3. Rest given by Jesus: I understood I could tell Jesus all my struggles and allow him to help me. Apostle Paul acknowledged how wretched he was and realized its only Jesus who could save.
  4. Abide in Jesus: Never lose hold of Jesus. Despite how bad your situation may be… keep telling him in prayers and acknowledging how you long for His help.

Commentary:

Glory to God for such a wonderful testimony from a brother. Dear reader. Are you struggling with any sin even after giving your life to Jesus? Do not be discouraged, Jesus is aware of your situation and has never left you nor does your situation disgust him. He needs you closer now! Never run away… After falling go to Him, tell him how you really want to be free, and partner with him in helping you. God bless you.

If you are yet to accept Jesus as your savior, you are indeed missing out on this love relationship. The God we serve is your friend and not your judge seeking to condemn you. Religion sees God as a judge whose duty is to destroy bad people, but the God we Christians serve is a father who has bought us to be His children. He corrects us as children and pulls us back to himself.

“Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me”. (Psalms 23:4)

Once a child forever a child!

To become a child of God today say this prayer to God:

Lord Jesus, i thank you for making a way for me to be restored back to God. I want to be your child, i confess that you are God and you can save me. Forgive me my many sins lord and come into my heart. I accept you today as my Lord and savior. Amen!

If you said this prayer, you are now a child of God. God sees you know as a child and is ready to lead you all the way into His loving arms.

No matter what you face as you progress in this Christian journey, tell it to God in prayers!

Do you have a testimony to bless someone? You too can share with us on Personal Outreach Ministry. Click here to share.

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